Strange night

It's a strange night.

Come with some strange but very familiar feeling back into my creepy head.

Intrude into my deep deep deep database, alright, skip those bullshits.

When I was in the BodyBalance with Orly, when he moved on the relaxation and medication phase, I get messed up. In my head, I get used to calm myself down or sort myself up in place that only me and me. ME ALONE.

Relax in the crowd get me freak out and yea, more thinking cracked out.

I started to miss someone that I shouldn't be anymore. After these few years, still that image will come out to haunt me once in a while or all the while, I guess that's more close to the truth.

I was so close, yea, distance between two fingers, to text that someone, not call, is text. Yes, I don't have the guts to call at all. In fact, that someone called me a few times already... Erm... Not that frequent, but I have no idea what that someone wants from me, in the case that we were ended up not in a good term.

But after I think of what happened last time, though time flies, things changed, I don't think people can change their style in just few months.

And so, yea, I didn't do anything at last. It's a strange night, luckily I am not a drinker, or else, I am in urge to get myself "beered".

I am going to turn 21 this year. This world has turned me down so many times, of course, I get cheer up from the other way as well, but it's utterly true that it's a mess. You live good, you live bad, you are going to die someday either, soon or later, you are getting older.

It's a strange night, to lure all these deep locked up pessimistic thoughts back to me, but since I am aware of it, I will keep them locked up later. Just let me finish this first.

I didn't text after-all. and I am prepare to bed and wishing that someone all the luck and blessings. One piece of me must be still with that someone.

It's a strange night.